We were underway out of Deception Island and on our way further south. It gets colder all the time but the weather also seems mild and more friendly. Snow falls now and then and you do feel like Santa Claus' south pole twin could be living somewhere here... there are so many nooks and crannies. We sail past lots of floating icebergs, the colour of a robin's egg on the bottom..... extremely translucent frozen blue and white snowy ice on top. They are so beautiful and on either side are islands of ice, enormous, only part of which are made of rock and stone. I feel like a tiny nothing compared to the size of these icy bodies.
 
By morning we are headed into the Guerlach  Strait, a passage between many glaciers anywhere between 5 and 1.5 miles wide. Our ship is doing very well and the Captain is really enjoying the fact he can take us to such a beautiful place. I am up at 4am you see thanks to the patch. I am also feeling apprehensive about the final stage. I know it will be hard and I ran all yesterday, never stopped to eat and just kept plugging. So now I am feeling ok, waking up is tough but I am feeling physically great. Guess I am pretty fit!
 
We see a ton of penguins, they are everywhere. On the shores and swimming all over the sea. At breakfast we see many swimming penguins and I say.... "where there are penguins, there are Orca." Then I proceed to eat an enormous carb heavy breakfast because we know that the race will start mid-day.
 
I am in my room when I hear Rodrigo on the tenoy announce: "Killer Whales, Killer Whales, off the starbord side". I grab the film camera with the amazing zoom William kitted me out with. My jacket and hat and run onto the upper deck. AMAZING, there are three pods of Orca, the black and white killer whale, playing and swimming. These are small int eh world of whales, but still plenty big.
 
I take a lot of photos and we watch the whales perform part of nature's dance.... they kill a few penguins and toss the poor thing back and forth. This is part of what they do. The captain has an amazing camera and he shows me shots of the penguin in the Orca's teeth. I am sad of course because I love the penguins! But it is amazing to witness.
 
I run down and get more film for the camera and then a huge Humpback Whale comes right alongside the ship with a calf. It make the sound of a GGGRRROOOAAANNN. It is enormous. The orca that swam by was about 1/3 the size of the Mamma Humpback. The blow of air is enormous and loud and long. I am so overwhelmed by this. How beautiful, how enormous and quietly giant.  I get in a few shots but preferreed to watch it with my own eyes.
 
Then we see the Orca... who eat mammals.... chase the humback calf and Mom. The are trying to seperate them and get the calf alone to dorwn it. We are all horrified at this. The Captain and his crew think we are ridiculious becuse this is the way of the sea. Guess we are too far removed to apprecdiate this part of nature. The orca are working hard to attack the humpback calf. There are 8 or 9 Orca on the Humpbacks.
 
Finlly we see giant flippers flying out of the sea. A giant tail and lots of action. The humpback Mommy is fighting off the Orca with her strength. She hits them with her flippers, disorientates the orca and wins the fight. They make it... for today.
 
I see this and while I do not like it I accept it. But it also makes me see why man killing whales gives them little chance. These whales breed once every 2 years and have one baby.... no wiggle room for man to be killing whales too!
 
Nature's show is over and we have to keep moving. The boat heads south again. We are headed to Dorian Bay on Goulur Island. And we have to be rready to race until 9pm. UGH..... I put my head into packing my gear. Anything can happen, snow, wind, blizzard. I wear my fleece under the windbreaker. It is ideqal. I am for some reason NOT looking forward to this final stage. I am praying for bad weather.
 
How can we be going into the frozen earth again, I am mentally and physically exhausted. Simone has a blister on her heel that is killing her. Deveram has torn part of his calf muscle. Lucy Tang has an IT band that won't stop screaming, Lucy RB is ready for a new knee, and I have had to rip off a toe-nail that grew and enormous blister behind it.
 
I am worried now, the report is snow up to knee-high. Are you kidding me????? I am like just over 5-feet tall, I cannot deal with this. It will take me ages to get thhrough just one loop of the course.
 
We get on the zodicas, I am like just going through the motions. I cannot think too far ahead of I cannot face it. Knee deep snow is enough to make me give up.
 
I get to the shore and it is nice, rocky floor and then a vertical climb tot he top of the glacier. Yes, we are racing on a glacier. The glacier sits in the bay and on one side is Dorian Bay where we landed and the other side is Port Lockroy. It is a huge island of rock and ice and.... penguins! Everywhere you look there are gentoo penguin rookeries. The are so funny hanging in their large- over 100 penguin- gangs. The snow where they are mainly hanging out is tainted brown with guano--- poo-- and it has a distinctive smell that doesn't bother me but does some of the other competitors.
 
We are shown the loop... it is a huge climb uphill and then further uphill and then cross-country and then steep downhill. A total of 2.5km in deep snow. We line up, this is it... the final stage. It is just after 2pm and we have to race until 9pm.
 
I line up near the front because we have to go one behind the other and I do not want to get stuck behind people. One thing this race has shown me and also from hearing about Triathalons from Am and Fen is that if you line up in the front you have to go faster but you also have a good position. I don't know what but that information was with me when I chose my spot in the line up today.
 
The final stage.... beautiful setting, impossible task ahead. My calves, my feet, my everything are quivering. The countdown... 10..9..8..7..6..5..4..3..2..1.... GO!!! We are off along the snow. WOW it is deep. Over my knees in many parts. I step where the others have stepped, slotting my snaller foot into the holes in the icy snow. It works well for me, this may be the one time tiny feet and smaller legs are helpful! I am HOONING along, I pass a few people, they are large men and too clumsy for such an agile task. Maybe I can do this well!
 
Next thing I know I am near the front pack (ok, not near winning man Ryan....) but near the other front runner. Eventually I come upon Maria Louisa, the top 3 woman and I pass her. Next I close in on the leading woman of the race, Diana. I stay behind her. My footsteps make her run ahead. I am now running too. This is going well. BAM... I finish the first lap. This goes on and on. I start to soak in the environment and it just makes me go faster and faster. I am so blown away that we are in Antarctica!
 
The loop passes about 4 or 5 penguin rookeries and then leads us uphill to a view on the crest of the galcier and looking at a lovely still glacial lake, amazing, like glass, and the air is still one moment and then windy and blizzardy in another moment. things change here quickly. Next we do a long climb and look down onto Port Lockeroy. Next we go along that crest to eventually head across back where we came in a steep downhill. This downhill was very deep snow. It was like skiing downhill in fresh powder but no skiis! I loved it, I just swooshed all over the shop and felt like a little kid in snow for the first time. I was on a natural high....
 
Of course the Hammer Sustained Energy may have helped me out too! I was feeling totally fueled up and roaring. One lap I spent with my big film camera and just jogged in the now packed-down snow. Shooting photos to remember this amazing place. I didn't care about my time, there was no chance I would not document the amazing location we are in, a once in a lifetime experience.
 
But the 7th lap around I was getting tired. Here I employed the iPOD strategy. I put on Katy Perry and rocked out. I wanted to do well, something inside me has changed. I could have slowed up and done fewer loops and taken longer. But something in me said.... push it. Go faster. Do it for you, make your parents proud, make William proud and tell the kids someday how you went ahead faster and better for no better reward than to know you did it inside of yourself.
 
In this moment I began to cry. I looked at where I was, and what I was feeling inside myself and felt like a champion inside my own skin. It was like no other moment. I ran and ran and fit in another 2-laps. There wqas no stopping me. I ran so hard I was crying and smiling and did not want to leave this place.
 
When I got to the finish line Mary gave me my medal and I thanked her for bringing me to this amazing place, a once in a lifetime achievement.
I feel so honoured to wear my medal. I did it. I did 10 laps, that is 25kms in 6.5 hrs in the deep snow. My body is now cold, the tide has risen up to the snow of the glacier and I am getting in the zodiac feeling frozen and fabulous.
 
Thank you to all who have supported and encouraged me.
I will write a final entry tomorrow.
 
Much love from world's end,
Jacqueline xox
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Guerlach Strait
 
Dorian Bay, Goulur Island

Last night the storm got worse and worse so we did not have to go back out onto the terrible, miserable track. Thank goodness. Instead we headed back out to sea to our next stage: Deception Island.
 
I did not want to have any issue with side effects of the patch so I skipped putting it on while we were still at anchor. And then we hit open seas. All I can tell you is that I never get sea sick, but I have also never been on a small ship in the Antarctic Sea. Well, the storm made things very rough and essentially I was green with nausea. Nothing worked. I did take a pill but it takes over an hour to take effect.
 
I felt my internal organs doing a the sea was rough and not letting up. They warned us things may fall off the shelves, that is how bad it became.
A trip outside on deck helped for a while but as you can imagine it was freezing and snowing a blizzard so I could not stay out there.
 
I wanted dinner t help me fuel up for tomorrow’s big day…. And so I head to the dining room…. OH NO… I am up there for aout 2 minutes, look at Alisdair and Andy, turn green and run like lightening to the back dor and outside deck.
 
Deep breaths, in and out. Watch the horizon line. It helps but as before it is only good while you are out there.
Dr. Grant gives me a nausea pill that dissolves on your tongue. I head back to my cabin to lay down. Lucy RB is not feeling well herself….. we lay on our beds and fall into a sea sick delirium. I eat some of my freeze dried lasagna that the chef inflated for me with boiling water. He cannot believe someone eats this since he is an excellent chef. But it is easy to keep down and kind of bland.
 
I fall asleep, I have no idea when though, and am woken up by an announcement on the tenoy calling us to breakfast. It is now 3:45am.
We are anchored off a snow covered Whalers Bay at Deception Island, an active volcano with hot springs and ashen shores.
 
I feel so well rested! I am organized and dress in my kit before breakfast, pack ready.
Everyone seems ready to run in fact, it is a good group on this race, no slackers.
 
We head over in the zodiacs and it is snowing medium to hard. You can see, but not very well. I think it looks like Christmas time!
I am so excited, the views are stunning, a horseshoe shaped bay of sheered rock pointing straight up on 3 sides. We organize ourselves by the deserted old rusted whale oil tanks on the shore. Of course I have to pee.
 
Pee will become the centre point of my day. I pee all the time. But on this race, on Antarctica you can only use the designated toilet at the start/finish of every loop. The loop is 2.52kms and it takes us alongside the beach and then up a steep hill to q point just at the base of a cut-out in the rock called Neptune’s Window. It was beautiful an that vista gave us a view over the whole bay. Snowy and icy an Antarctic in every way.
 
A silver coloured seal flip flopped onto the route and decided to relax so they adjusted the route to bypass her. We do not disturb the wildlife, this is their island!
The race began at 6am and the plan was to go until 9pm. At the start I felt very down about racing for 15 hours. But soon I perked up, and began to go faster, and faster. And faster… Yes… today I got my RACE ON!
 
The weather was windy in one direction but my red hat worked well. Everyone looked strong and we are not used to going round and round… but this loop is quite small. I am in awe of Antarctica. It is just beyond me…. Penguins were on and off the shore and the route all day. Chinstrap and Gentoo penguins. So adorable, you cannot believe these animals are real! The beauty of this place is not lost on me despite my fast pace--- well fast for me. Ryan keeps passing me as does Paolo… the leaders. But I am also passing people too and that feels oddly good. I am not competitive but doing well is a boost to the running ego.
 
I keep the shuffle up all day. But I am getting tired. The sun comes out and I start stripping layers. The jacket and waterproof pant shells come off. Then I decide my feet are feeling tired and sore so I take off the wooly big socks and stay in the injingi toe-socks. I took out the insoles in my cabin, so I am running in shoes that have no insoles. It is excellent…. I have lots of room and it is freeing. My feet are dry and warm… I love these shoes!
 
I put on the ipod. Lady Gaga and then Madonna. I am eating the pancake, dry, from breakfast. It is pure carbs and works great as easy-to-digest fuel. The sustained energy is going down well as my powder and I rock on and on. Everyone is so impressed with me it feels so nice. I appreciate this a lot and it pulls me ahead. We are all so supportive of one another since we see each other coming and going
 
Next I put Katy Perry on and she rocks out and makes me go even stronger. My body is exhausted but I am still fine, I have lots more in me!
At 2:30 the wind picks up. This wind is Antarctic so it is very strong and biting cold. Like a slap on the cheek with a wet dodgeball. OUCH.
 
The neoprene mask and balaclava go on asap. (Thanks Re Wong…)
I also add my red hat on top. It makes me feel warm and happy.
 
Ut now the snow is starting too and we are al trying to keep it together.
As if they could sense the Captain’s worry about the strength of the wind… we are told the race will stop at 5:30.
I want to go stronger, faster, get in a few more KMs… but I can only just manage my pace.
I am getting out my ipod and loose a glove…N O!!!!
Helen finds it… WHEW… need that glove and don’t want to litter Antarctica. It is a big deal….
 
Phil looks tired and exhausted but he keeps going hard, I am so impressed. Ryan looks fed-up and annoyed but runs even faster to get his KMs in…
I think about my kids, about Mom and then have an idea…. I put on Christmas Carols!!!
I have a Christmas playlist on my iPod and this kicks me into high gear once again!!! I am reborn and fast and happy and jolly like running Santa!I am in Antarctica, snow falling, penguins crossing my path and listening to “Winter Wonderland”.
 
I ended the day with 23 laps, and proud (although wanted to do 25 laps).
The terrain and temperature, heavy gear ad conditions all make us a lot slower than the desert. It is a big deal and impressive.
I will probably not do 250km but I will do many, many hours. This race, The Last Desert is about endurance, about time out there running your hardest.
I am dedicated to that and feel that this is the biggest challenge I have had to face to date.
 
When I finally stop at 5:30 for the end of the days race I did over 50km and it is now a blizzard. The second I stop my hands freeze up like icebergs and I can barely move my hands. AS I head to the Zodiac I think about this place, this beautiful and haunting island. We watch from the bridge the captain and his crew leave the treacherous and narrow channel of deception island…. So well executed and also a bit daunting with such high winds and only 200m visability.
 
Toda has been a milestone for me. I was happy all day, I thought of my Mom, William, the kids and my Dad. But I did not cry I am running toward them, and to everyone who has written to me, I am motivated by your support and it carries me ahead, one shuffle step at a time.
 
On to another testing day tomorrow after 14 hours of rough open seas… sea-sick patch ON!
Love from World’s End. xox

I went to bed at about 11pm, I was exhausted. My body feels great, fine, tired for sure but nothing too bad. However the asthma thing has taken the wind out of me. And it has me a bit nervous.
I spoke to Dr. Brandi and Dr. Grant—Mom you can email them your thanks for being very clever docs….
 
Anyway, it has been a tough night and getting to bed was not easy in a way, felt I had a weight on my chest.
But the plan was for a 3:45am wake up call… how can they expect s to start running at 6am, after only 4hrs rest?I am not pleased at the idea, but in fact I am also not surprised. This is why these races are the hardest in the world. This is why the medal is so well earned, and why so many peopl drop out.
 
On that note, one of the strongest runners, Mark Jaget who ws top 10 if not top 5 men started getting frostbite and had to drop out. Another had seriously frozen feet and had to withdraw from the race. He was quite annoyed, I don’t blame him. Not sure where that line is drawn between letting someone continue if they want to take the chance or doctors frcing them to stop. But were I doctor I am sure I would know that line, and we competitors may not know the actual medical implications.
 
Which is why I knew that Docs Grant and Brandi allowing me to start again means I am fine. And this morning, when they announce at 3:40am that we are delayed due to wnds, I feel fne so I am quite hapy--- and get another few hours rest!
 
Lucy wakes me up at 8:15…. Breakfast was already being served. We hussle up there and there are so many rumors about when the start will be… 9am, 10am, etc….. so I visit my friend El Capitan in the bridge for the real forecast…. He shows me the amazing instruments and techniquues to measure the wind. The boat has to be facing directly into the wind and then they measure the force, he says it is slowing down and we will be startng to race soon enough…. Oh wll, so much for a day off.
 
Everyone gets themselves together. We have abot 90 minutes because Chuck and Alisdair have to get to shore with all the supplies and still mark the course. It is a tough and slow going job. I am happy for them to take their time.
 
My body is fine now but I have these waves of nausea going on. I cannot shake it. I am packing my bag, dryng my shoes with a hair-dryer and making some choices about gear and food. I had to many snacks yesterday. I have kept it simple and run up and grab some bread and a pancake. I need carbs. I was too sluggish yesterday wth the dried fruit and jerkey. Carbs will keep my digestion efficin for the run.
 
I take my time getting onto one of the last zodiac boats. I ride over wth Ryan Sandes, the front runner (by a huge amount) and he seems fresh and rested, but also just like us… this is a bit of a slag and we just have to do it. This is the race. I feel like this race is very challengng, firstly because it is such a departure from the others. We naver have so many variables to the course day.. everyone is on “standby” all the time. Also, the weather can be quite dangerous.
 
We get to shore, ready outrselves and start--- today the long 10k loop is the first one. I start walking in the pack and then begin to run. I am fine, energy good and pass people quite quickly. My breathing is fine, and I have my neck well covered to keep me cozy. I run full speed every downhill, knowing that helps me gain a lead. The slushy flats are annoying but I do a swoosh motion to make them go faster. I cannot get a stitch of traction on those bits.
 
Soon I am near the front 1/3. Ryan of course passes me about 60% of the way to the top of the loop. And I was surprised to see the next runners not too far behind. It is fun to see people on the course. I start to increase my speed. I know that it is all mental. I tell myself I need to get ahead, get the distance under my belt. I want to do 4 loops not 3 today. I can make it happen.
 
Soon I am passing may people and that always boosts the confidence a bit. I keep going. I reach the turn-around point and head back uphill, trying to keep a solid pace. It was a great run but about 70% of the way back to the flags Rodrigo, from the boat, tells us a storm is approachin and we have to go back to the ship. NO WAY! I am all dressed and running, I don’t want to stop now! But I make the best of it and run hard to the “finsih” of the day. It was a great run and I fel awesome. Too bad I can only clock 10k. Even Ryan only did that distance.
 
We get in the boats, the sea is rough and skies grey… 10 minutes after I am on board the slushy snow starts coming down hard. Alisdair, Mary and Chuck arrive on board last and are wet and weather beaten.
 
I am happy they called us in looking outside it is a blizzard now, wind blowing the chunky flakes nearly horizontal. Ryan just told me he doesn’t want to go out again, would prefer a day of rest. Lucy RB’s pain killer just took effect when she got back on board. Everyone looking forward to a hot lunch and a snooze. Hope things don’t clear until the morning.
 
My spirits are good, and philosophical. This is a huge challenge, different from all others. Being ready to change gears at amomnts notice. Forging ahead wthout knowing when things will start, finish or take you. I feel like this is one of the biggest challenges I have faced to date.
 
And when I think of the challenge my Mom is facing, I can run faster. This race is my choice, her race is for her health and her happiness for many many years into the future. I hope that donations are good because I am thinking of Mom and all the other people fighting cancer a lot on the course, they inspire me every step.
 
PS- no penguins today.
Xox runmammarun.com
 

Last night before dinner we had a mandatory lecture about how we are to behave in Antarctica. Pablo is young and you may think inexperienced, but he spoke about hw we are to be so incredibly careful and he made it very clear that this is a place untouched and needs to remain so.
I am very impressed with his and the crew’s passion for Antarctica and how special it is. For example… we cannot step on any of the moss… it grows 1cm every 2 years! We cannot go away from the route by more than a few feet because the birds nest in the gravel and we might disturb them. We cannot pee or poo…we cannot under any circumstances leave or take anything. Not a rock, not a twig… nothing. It is our job to leave this place as it was before so our great grandchildren can come and admire this place exactly as it is today.
 
I took this to heart, it was almost moving to hear these young guys talk about Antarctica with a love and care people use when talking about their children. Also, they told us what to do if a seal charges us…. What?! The leopard seals can be aggressive, and we are to stand still, and raise our arms and yell and scream and make a scene because they will not challenge a larger more scary beast. If we have poles or see a rock nearby, we should toss it at them lightly to waive them off, but not to hurt them.
 
Ooookkkkaaayyy….. that’s a bit worrisome…..
We leave the lecture and head to dinner. It was delicious as usual and we find out about the 6am start.UGH. I decide to take my sea sick patch off because it has me all cloudy and we are almost there, needs time to wear off.
 
At about 1am I am guessing I hear a loud scraping noise, a few times. It sounds like either the keel hitting bottom or attempts to drop anchor. Thankfully it is the latter. I assumed so because the crew here is totally amazing, very much on the case. I feel 100% safe on this ship, with this crew.
 
AT 3:40am we are told over the ships intercom that the winds are over 30knots… not possible to zodiac and land on Antarctica. So we sleep in more and get up for breakfast at 8am. I slept like a BABY! Talking that patch of was the best idea ever, I am totally refreshed, like a new person! I am giddy with anticipation for the race.
 
The winds do not die down and finally at 10am they tell us to get our gear on, we are leaving to King George Island in 30 mins. THIS IS IT!!!
 
At this point you have to be mentally OK with your kit. Not the time to second guess things, we have to bundleup, grab our drop bags and rinse your wellies (for the boat) and also rinse our trainer soles…. We are not allowed to risk cross-contaminating Antarctica with anything on the soles of our shoes. Transfer of bacteria and such could ruin the pristine environs. I am so happy to see how careful everyone is.
 
I will be honest…. King George Island is the least impressive because of the fact it is where all the bases are. A horizon dotted with several, about a total of 2-dozen shipping containers crafted into research labs and living quarters. BUT- we land and two penguins greet us. I am in love… penguins are so adorable, they are even cuter than puppies and kittens and little lambs.
 
Once everyone is at the start we head out through the walking zone- the sensitive area through the main buildings. And we are off. The first loop is fine, but the terrain is much more hily than expected. I had a wardrobe malfunction… gaiter issue, and Tremain Kent stopped to help me, thanks T! I would have fallen over otherwise.
 
I try to catch up on lost time and it works, I get my jog on and run the whole first loop. The terrain is very hilly in fact, lots of slush and I am so happy to have goretex shoes on with big ole gaiters. My clothing is brill… I am sorted.
 
Then I see a seal, a silver one, laying and bleeding on the snow. OUCH, poor animal is struggling. I see Pablo the enviro guy up ahead and ask him about it… apparently an Orca tried to eat it. The seal got away and h says she will live. Whew… this may be nature… for real… but I don’t have to like it!
 
The second lop starts fine but by mid-loop on the long part I loose my steam. My breathing becomes short and labored, but I keep running the flats and downhills, the uphills are so oddly tough. I cnnot decide why.
 
The snacks I ate--- dried mangos ad some biltong (south African jerkey) are making me feel sick. I try
to keep taking the sustained energy electrolyte/carb/protein drink and it helps a bit.  Why am I having such a tough time breathing? Uphills are my best thing!
 
But the third route around I am getting slow and have had to stop every pass by the porta-loos for a wee. That is making me loose time… it adds up. Thankfully Amy Tye is at one part and her hugs make me feel a bit more loved, needed that!
 
The snowy parts of the trail are now slush and in some cases a river of waist-deep freezing cold water. People are falling in, my feet have been soaked and by this third time around my goretex shoes cannot withstand it and I am now speed walking with frozen feet.
 
Neil is nearby and we walk together, thank goodness for him and the cinnamon Altoids my Mom and Dad gave me at the airport. A great taste in my mouth, sharing with all who I see that need a boost. It is about 6pm and just over halfway done with third loop--- it will be my last since they know I could not finish a fourth by the cut-off at 9pm.
 
I tredge through, see Phil and that is always a happy moment, and feel very down I could not make 4 loops.
My breath is very tough now, it must be the cold, right?
 
When I get into the finish line I ask Dr. Brandi Waite. She hears my breathing and says I am havig an asthma attack! She makes me use an inhaler and says I was lucky. It helps quite quickly although I am not perfect. Holy Crap! That is scary!!!
 
She tells me to keep the inhaler, and I head toward the zodiac to go back. I feel like crap from the asthma, but my legs, etc are great. I am REALLY ANNOYED about this. The group of Adelie and Chin-strap Penguins by the zodiacs cheer me up…. Penguins are the locals here, and they are so playful, so cute and full of personality. I am smitten.
 
On the zodiac I get another attack… As soon as I set foot on ship  have another 2 puffs and need to lie down. This is bad. But thankfully Dr. Brandi is wise and I listened.
 
I am recovering now and feel OK. But I really do not want to do this course again tomorrow…. That is the plan. Everyone please wish for bad weather…. Really bad, so they cancel the stage.
I need a day off, ran a marathon- 26 miles today in awful conditions. Medal?? I want one… NOW.
 
My spirits are low, I am not sure about tomorrow and despise the slush…. It is awful.
 
 

I went to bed about 10pm and had several dreams about seeing a pod of whales outside my porthole, so I kept getting up and then had to pee and finally fall back asleep. It was utterly annoying, and my pillow is too thick--- this race is too luxe for me… I am used to a dirt floor and sleeping bag.
 
And basically that sums up competitors…. We can always find something to complain about even though we don’t really mean it and none of it matters really.
 
I woke up at 4am… almost feel like that is normal for me at this point, and headed up to see my friend the first officer on the bridge. He is very nice, a grandpa and we swapped family stories while he made me a strong cup of Caffe Negro. I looked at our course, they plot it out very accurately and in pencil, plus fill in a log book every 30 mins. I have to say this whole ship thing is a lot of responsibility and very meticulious and clumsy me should not get involved with such fine instruments.
 
I will be honest and say that I am pretty bored of being on this ship. I am basically eating and chatting and sleeping. I have no function and a very limited world… the ship is big but not enormous. I have sussed out the whole vessel and now need new things to do.
 
Sometimes I head outside on one of the decks and try to spot whales. When I see absolute zip, I begin my whale song. Yyyeewwwoooooww- mmmmiiiiiiiioooooooaaaaawww. The long whines of the whales, I figure they wil be at
Racted to our ship if I sound like a whale myself.
 
Needless to say this strategy did not work, not even once! No  whales anywhere. But my shipmates all think I am bonkers whining and yowling like a whale. At least I am trying, right?
 
I know this sounds terribly spoiled as I am on my way to the end of the Earth for goodness sake, but if I am honest… I am ready to get off this boat. We all are. But get off and do what…..at present we are all awaiting the course briefing….
 
I read my book on the sofa of the main cabin. It is amazing how a book can transport you, and I almost felt as if I were in EL Doctrow’s novel, back in victorian New York… except for the fact that a big swell came along and rolled me right off the sofa. Ahhh, back in the present.
 
I must have dozed off on the sofa because I woke up about 90 mins later. After going back to my cabin, Lucy RB asleep (of course) I dozed another 30 mins and thought everyone on board may like it if I had a shower…. Finally.
 
The shower was hot and refreshing, again though this feels like cheating really because in the other races we have no water, no proper toilets, and certainly no beds. Oddly, I feel less prepared, despite my present comforts and cannot shake this cloudy feeling from my head thanks to the sea sick patch.
 
After breakfast we had our race briefing…..
We will be wken up at 3am and must be on the boats by 5am. Ready at the start line for 6am.
The ferrying of people on the zodiacs takes some time, and we have to be ready to go.
 
The course for tomorrow will be a 14.5km figure-eight loop and we have to race until 9pm.
Do you know what that means???? I will be out there for 15 hours… if we can’t do 15 hours, we are disqualified. So the goal is to do as many KMs as possible inside the 15 hours. What the???!!!
 
I am freaking out. How can I possibly not get so bored I want to quit on a circuit or 15 hours!!!
This is playing with my mind. No new landscape… see it once you will see it again. Monotomy is my Achilles heel! If I get bored, I will get slow and I will be racing the next 5 days afterward for ages.
 
The idea is to do as much as you can so the next race days you have fewer KMs to do in order to make 250k.
It is a whole new challenge… for everyone. The past 3 deserts mean NOTHING, we are being tested in every way, mental, physical, emotional. I listen further to the rules….
 
#1: No pee or poo on the course. If you do--- disqualified.
There will be  designated porta-loo on the track. You just gotta hold it in. This rule is a serious problem for me, I usually pee like every 30 minutes!
 
#2: any litter on the course and you are disqualified.
This should be OK, I am very careful and do not use Gu’s or Gels which are most likely to fly away, but I am curious to see what happens to other competitors.
 
#3: You must stay within 1metre of the course. If you are seen wandering off for a photo- you are disqualified.
OK, so no jaunts over to a photo opp… got it.
 
#4: Penguins and all wildlife have the right of way. If a penguin is walking in front of you, let him pass. We may not in any way scare or disrupt the little guys. This one has me a bit excited that we will surely be amongst the penguins, so exciting!
 
Sam gets  up to discuss the gear plan… we have a drop bag at the central checkpoint. But we cannot access it until after the 15 hours. It is basically an incase of emergency bag and for when we are awaiting the zodiac back to the boat and need our down parka, etc. Also if we get stranded, as a group, we have our sleeping bags and food in there.
 
As soon as the briefing is done I race back to the cabin to pack. I am not yet organized and am worried. We are all freaking out, and hope for good weather, little wind chill and no snow. Meanwhile, outside it begins to rain and that means snow on King George Island.
 
I finally pack my rucksack and drop bag…. Not too heavy but I go over it again, eliminate some things, change where things are for accessability and try to imagine a goal for myself to get though the day.
 
I see Mary and ask her what pace she feels I might be able to do on average. She knows me and is an expert. Mary says 5km/hr on average. That means I can do 5 loops in 15 hours. Which adds up to nearly 75kms. OK… that is my goal. But I start to wonder…. If a penguin gets in front of me I may loose my race to a penguin!!!
 
I have been laying in my room, trying to get myself in a positive place for tomorrow. These conditions are already harsh and I am not there yet. My confidence is fading and I am really worried about my being too slow, having a sluggish performance and not able to handle 15 hours in such a difficult geography.
 
Tonight I plan to get as much sleep as possible and will have to channel all of my family and friends positive vibes to get me through. I knew this would be tough, but this is as much a mental challenge as a physical one d I am not feeling my strongest in either category.
 
I am also worried about my shoes and blisters after that awful one a few days ago in Ushuaia.
This is the first time what lay ahead comes into focus. I am racing an ultra marathon in Antarctica…. What the???
I wish I was home in bed, William and the kids all cuddled up. I don’t want to be cold and tired and mentally drained. I am not ready, or am I?
 
If I can just put one foot in front of the other it should be OK. I am going to keep my thoughts basic because the challenge ahead is scaring me. I have the fear thing in my belly.
 
Please send me your love and encouragement. I need it, I am so nervous.
Xox Jacqueline

Well, here’s the thing…. I am hydrated to the max because I had to visit the toilet every hour… the dry mouth from the preventative sea sickness patch has made me drink a lot all night and then of course pee.
At about 4am I could not stay in bed any longer. Lucy is fast asleep and I am soooo jealous.
 
I put on my awesome down North Face booties and head up to the bridge. Everyone is asleep but the First Officer and a mate are up navigating, so we got to sit in the big chair, keep a lookout over the sea and was brought a cup of coffee. Sensing I may be a klutz… he informs me not to lean on the instruments. Guess I have clumsy written all over my face.
 
I am so angry I am not sleeping well. But the good news is I am not in any way sea sick, no nausea, etc.
After a while I get my book and head to the main cabin where there are some very comfy sofas, I start to read and then wake up about an hour or more later…. Ahhhh a few more winks and I feel a bit better.
 
The ship is doing well, but the swells are decent in size, so the rocking does put you “out of it” even if you are not sick. I am just feeling a bit blobish… I have had no exercise or walking round or anything for 2 days now and I think the lack of doing, well, anything…. Prevents me from getting a good rest.
 
Amy, Phil’s wife is hoping the sea gets calmer, but I broke it to her… this is calm. Then people start to come up for breakfast… food on board is top notch. A great buffet brekie and loads of tea and coffee. Lively conversation with Lucy Tang… she and her pal Ali are tooooo funny, like a comedy team and that makes us all giggle.
 
Soon we head into the bowels of the boat for a lecture by an ornothologist about all of the palegic birds we will see. I now know how to spot the many varieties of Petril and Albatross… I have seen many wandering albatross and sooty ones too. I tried to take some photos of the birds but the camera won’t take a photo! I have to find Zandy the photog on this race for some help… however the poor guy is sea sick and passed out….
 
After a delish lunch I read my book and head down for a nap… finally I get a snooze in, about 1.5hrs and Lucy RB is asleep next bed, she is like my idol right now. The girl can sleep! What happened to me? I used to be able to do that. How old am I getting? Geeze.
 
This boat thing is getting a bit monotonous to be honest. I am not winging, but I need to do something. It is strange that everyone is passing out all over the boat. A few sickness casualties… man I am happy that is not me right now.
 
I attend the lecture on whales, I am just so excited and hope we see some! You cannot believe how many whales there are, and also how bad the Japanese whaling industry is, even though the lecturer did not take a side in his talk, it is quite appalling. But the funny thing is that during the talk when a biggish swell would hit people had to brace themselves in their chairs because one or two fell over in the bird talk…  being at sea is quite an experience.
 
There is no land for as far as the eye and binocular can see. The deep blue water colour is amazing and I really have my eye out for the big blow hole of  the earth’ largest mammal…..
 
I am now getting sleepy and need a sleep. Diner has come and gone.. Zandy the photog has surfaced, a bit green, and fixed my camera…something about apperature setting knocked wrong.
 
I am so ants in the pants… so is Lucy Tang and Sam Gash so we head into the gym for some silly exercise on the bikes and treadmill. Then we run up like a girl gang to the top deck for fresh air…. Ahhhh I feel renewed.
 
It is dark now, for just a few hours.
I am exhausted but not tired…. This journey is as much of a challenge as anything and the speculation about stage 1 on Saturday abounds…. I am beginning to get worried it will be not only tough but a bit boring if that is possible on Antarctica?!
 
I miss William and the kids and was happy to hear that Mom is doing well.
That kind of news makes me stronger too.
 
PS—everyone at my dinner table took some anti nausea meds but me. Now they are all dappy and silly.
How are we all going to run 100 miles day after tomorrow I will never know!!
 
Please send me Whale vibes and I promise to take great photos!! xox

I slept better last night after a bout in the hot tub at our hotel. It is beautiful here and the sun  is shining, water clarity is unbelievable.  I think this is such a beautiful place for every type of activity, although I am not sure how happy the locals are. Regardless they are polite and warm, always smiling.
 
I ran into town to post a few cards and lost Lucy so I had to taxi back myself and hope she is not on the street looking for me. WHEW she  is at the hotel and all is fine.
 
I wanted to buy a cozy sweater from the gift shop but they must be woven with something different because I kept sneezing and scratching…. So no purchase here.
 
OK, time to face my luggage. Damn I have a load of gear… this race is throwing me for a loop because we usually just leave our cases at the hotel and grab a carefully packed backpack and head on the but to the hot desert…. BUT this time we are on a boat and need a zillion layers .Not only to keep warm but to have options for the next day since our things from one race day my not dry in time to the next!
 
Lucy and I are packing up and it is very odd… I cannot find one of my converse!! How weird is this. I have no idea where the thing went. This occupied my time so much in the end I had to toss everything in my luggage and simply get out of the room.
 
Five of us in a mini van with mental amounts of luggage, we head to the meeting point- hotel albatross  opposite of the pier. It is great to see old race friends, I know about 90% of the competitors from past races, everyone in the dark about what to expect and we are all going through the motions.
 
After getting our forms signed, bags labeled and such we walk to the boat. It’s a converted tanker and it is great. Not fancy at all, but a lot better than expected. A great main cabin just the right size to accommodate all 82 people, including the competitors, staff and media and family/friends who are not racing.
 
Lucy and I get our cabin assignment--- whew… not on the level down below. It is a great cabin! Two plush twin beds and a desk and wardrobe. Private bathroom is decent and everything very clean.
 
The crew is introduced to us and they are so friendly, everyone has the upmost respect for Antarctica so that sentiment comes through to all of us… one of the last natural, unspoiled places on earth. A privlidgeto be permitted to set foot on shore!
 
The we have an emergency drill. How fantastic! Everyone in their life-vests, learning how to get on the boats. We feel very safe, the captain and crew are on the case… see Mom it’s fine!
I am really calm now that we are on board. Everyone has been apprehensive about the race and they plan to do about 160km on day 1…
 
I am of two minds here on that. I like the idea of getting the bulk of the KMs under our belts so I can enjoy myself..and Antarctica,  after a hard race. But basically I am scared to start out so huge and how bad I will be and so tough after 3 days at sea.
 
I put my sea sickness patch on at the hotel, so I am now feeling a bit wonky, drowsy and have dry mouth like I am chewing cotton balls.
 
When will this day be over!! Finally Andy and Sam come check the mandatory equipment and it makes me realize how disorganized I am at the moment. Yes, I have all the kit, but it’s everywhere. Where is Damien!! He could sort this out in a flash…. I am going to channel him tomorrow.
 
Well, finally I get some dinner at about 10pm and then head to bed all bleary eyed at 11pm. The cabin is cosy and warm. I like it in there. The sea begins to rock me to bed, a small, gentle roll and the skies have gone dark (but not pitch black ever…)
 
Let’s hope the jet lag is behind me….Until the morning…. Skipper Jacqueline (not) signing out.
xx

I woke up from the jet lag at 5am and Lucy RB was sound asleep, lucky girl.
I put my kit on and went out for a run, first time in my race shoes aside from a short hike in HK.

Well, I was loving this, it was light out because it's like 23 hrs sunlight. And basically I ran by the Beagle Channel, amazing views, crisp air, stunning.

I got 3/4 of the way to the airport, after 40mins, and basically my instep was killing me.
I knew what was happening a blister. CRAP!
I am sooooo annoyed right now, these are my race shoes... an they race has not even begun!
So basically I am screwed and I am sweating and now that I am stopped I am getting cold and no one is around so I run to the airport and turn around quickly.

I call William and he makes me feel better just hearing his voice.
Ahhhh...
The run back was easy, the air here is so sweet and fresh, I see an Argentinian brown fox along the way. Snapped a pic, not great though.

I love it here, I want to come back and ski or trek or something.
Fishing is big here, I cannot get over the views. 360 degrees of natural wonders.

I approach the hotel, about 3 yards away and see a big yellow retriever heading toward me to say Hi. I pet him, bouncy thing and toss a stone for him to fetch, and turn to jog into the hotel.

But low and behold.. the dog retrieves the stone and while my back is turned he jumps on me for a cuddle.... BOOM
I am on the ground, SLAM into my side, OUCH! I am really in pain but nothing serious.

I limp back to the room, Lucy is just up and she is laughing at me... running and back with a blister, enormous and taken down by a dog! Well, the damage is not too bad and I am fine.

I pop the blister and we head down to breakfast and to town.
I like the town, and not expensive. Saw lots of race pals on the street.

Feeling better about life and trying not to think of the ominous blister after just an hour and a half jog!
(freaking out a bit....)

Heading to the boat tomorrow.
xox

Beatrice and William had been camping so just Wyn and I woke up today and it was quite special having him all to myself.
I did absolutely no packing last night. I am a bit in denial about leaving, and while I know that this is an amazing exèrience ahead of me, I am just feeling a bit overwhelmed.

My Mom has not been having a very successful time with the overall care she is receiving at the hospital when she comes in for her chemo. And to be honest, I am not sure what makes sense anymore. Here in Hong Kong, at public hospitals you wait for ages, but in private ones you are treated like royalty. My Mom is at a private hospital in NY but so is everyone else (no public hospitals) so she has to wait for ages despite being one of the people who can afford good care. It sounds terrible, but I just think if you can afford it, you should get some better kind of service. Isn´t that what you hope you success will bring you anyway?

I am biased for sure. But all of these issues are clouding my thoughts as I prepare for the race, my departure from home.
Wyn and I head out to run some very last minute errands, he and I are a great little team and he loves to explore and is old enough that he prefers to walk and too young to really whinge and carry on. We took the tram back to Happy Valley and that was just such fun because he loves to look out of the windows on top and I think--- when did this become unexciting for me where I have to go to Antarctica for an adventure?? Part of me wants to stay right here and just ride the tram with Wyn every day.

But eventually even he gets tired of looking out the window and that answeres my question right there. The need for a challenge and adventures new... it must be in my blood.

HR is perhaps the first person who made me really contemplate where I am off to. I really had not given it much thought.
I sign up for these adventures because it sounds like something wildly exciting and then I don´t really picture it more exactly until I am actually there. And so even now as I write this I have not even begun to even attempt wrapping my head around racing in Antarctica.

The packing is basically done now, but I have triple of many items because I fear things getting wet and not drying. Being cold by any means is going to make me miserable so that is what I am protecting myself against. Warm and cosy... thats the way to happiness, success.

William and Beatrice come home and we have a great family lunch together, the camping was like her own adventure challenge. William passed out in the tent early so he is well rested but missed the bulk of the Daddy chat (what do you guys talk about I always wonder) because women talk about all sorts, but nothing sorrid.

Anyway, now it si crunch time. I have not sent out any "I am off to Antarctica..." emails and so it is tough to listen to my HOW TO USE A CAMERA briefing by William who has so lovingly put a camera bag together for me, bought me a fancy lens and given me tons of film so I can blow up my photos later with great success. I am a horrid photographer and so let´s see what happens.....

I put Wyn down for his nap and am so sad to go I start cryting in his room as I sing him the goodnight song I made up when he was born. I tape some photos of me to his foot-board and hope that my image will comfort him these next 15 nights without me. I have the kids photos with me always, Mummy bragging rights etc.

I finally zip up the bags and have a long goodbye with beatrice. She is so sweet, I love her, my little best friend that she is. I know how much she needs me and I hate leaving. At this moment, the sponsorship, Cancer Fund, etc is all out of my head and I cannot remember why I am leaving her!

In the car with William I am filling my Outbox onthe laptop with emails to tell people to log on and sponsor me, follow the race. I really cannot bear to have people not donate.... this is an important cause and any money is most appreciated... hint hint.

William is just so amazing, how can someone be so supportive and loving and funny and be a man? I know none other like him in the world. He makes me feel able to leave and comfortable and not worry. I am the most lucky woman, and in the middle of it all he is about to do the Trailwalker 100km race on the weekend, which is so tough. They will be amazing. William is the strongest link in that chain if I do say so myself!

We have a long and tearful goodbye at the airport, I don´t understand going without him. I want toshare EVERYTHING with William. But he sends me off and in true Furniss tradition for many generations we wave goodbye incessently until we can no longer see one another down the road. I love that. I am crying.

WELL---- now the boring bit. The flights... many. I never, ever get upgraded by Cathay. And I am a very loyal, very frequent flier. I am about fed up!! I get on board after buying some magazines and a book and find I am in the very wide exit row so I am feeling better. My video screen is not working.... 16.5 hrs to JFK, New York... I am about to throw a wobbly fit... but they reset it 2x and it works, whew. And I saw some good stuff I cannot remember on the flight. Get Me To The Greek? Russel Brand is just too funny and all the things americans love about brit rock stars. But this flight is never ending. I get an hour of sleep here, and hour there. Nothing major, and I am just watching the time pass as slow as treacle....

Finally the flight arrives, and I am so excited to see my Mom and Dad!!! It is very strange to see them and basically have them chaperone me from terminal 7 to 8 but my Mom looks great and my dad is also looking very good. They just came from a funeral, which is not so nice but I am happy to see them and also glad they are excited for me even though I know the worry so much.

I cannot really imagine what I would feel if Beatrice were opn her way to do this race....
My parents broughgt me some magazines I wanted and also sugar free altoids I just loved seeing them and they waved me off... onto Buenos Aires.

I have no idea how long this flight is, after 16.5 hrs who cares!!! But then I find out I am in a middle seat--- CRAP and then that the flight is delayed 2 hrs... CRAP and then this is a 10 hr flight. WHAT the????

I am so beside myself I cannot even cry. I just sink into my itty bitty seat and begin to read my book, a new one by EL Doctorow. It is gripping and fun so I am pleased. I even fall asleep a bit... hooray, and eat like 3 brownies (sorry Liza). It is desperate in this crammed in seat. I need to earn a fortune so I fly business ALWAYS....

Somehow a whole day has pàssed... it is mid-morning when I land and feel awful, dizzy, exhausted. One of the other competitors I know is on the flight so that is great, getting me out of the family missing stage and into race mode a bit.

Buenos Aires airport is a bit of a hassle but small enough its not too bad, I have to get my bags and go 2 terminals over. My bags are taking ages.. I am freaking out.... where are they!!! People always loose a bag and it is my turn I know it.

WHEW they finally arrive the sight of them mystical. I get on board the flight to Ushuaia and am so tired I sleep like the dead thanks to the neck pillow I bought at terminal A.

We land in the most beautiful landscape ever seen, world´s end it is. The beagle channel on one side with a vista of Chile, the snow capped mountains of Patagonia on the other side. My hotel is the most stunning in the city (thanks Lucy RB) and I am safe and sound.

Footnote--- Lucy Tang and her pal Ali have no bags.... I am trying to make them feel ok but cannot imagine dealing with that after sooo many hours of travel.

I speak to William and the kids, and my Mom and Dad.
So happy to be here, miss everyone too much. I cannot stop looking outside

I have recently secured sponsorship from a friend of my husband, Bruce Rockowitz, on behalf of PURE fitness. I can now move ahead with my training for the big race, which is my fight to help those with cancer. A huge thanks to Bruce, his partner Coco and everyone at PURE. In July my Mom was diagnosed rather suddenly with Stage 4 Lung Cancer. We are all shocked and devastated and suddenly thrown into a huge fight to keep her quality of life ongoing. It has been tough these few months, and this race is helping me channel my fears, sadness and anger into something good. Our friend Sally Lo, founder of the HK Cancer Fund, runs a charity which does good on a global level to help those fighting cancer- funneling money toward research and care for those who need it. I am training SO HARD- 5-6x per week and finally working on the core with Re Wong pilates and food with dietitian Liza Goodman. I am running in my Vibram KSOs and Asics Tarthers, and consuming lots of Hammer Products in between healthy salads at Pizza Express. It is all happening, and soon to come are fundraising events to help me stay focused and realize that this race is bigger than one woman, it is a way to help millions. I was not so pleased to hear that there will be no professional photographer on the race as there has been in every other RTP event, but there is still time for the organizers to chuck someone worthy on board. (please! everyone wants photos it's friggin' ANTARCTICA for goodness sake) It has been so difficult being far away from my Mom and Dad during this time. We do MAC iChat a lot.... but somehow for me, my runs and swims with IHP and cycles and such all keep me from getting down and dark and weepy. That and the support of so many family, friends and sponsors. I know this will be an amazing race, and I plan to share it with all of my blog readers if you will join me on the most important race of my life. I love you Mom! xox Jacqueline